no procrastination this time around

I have a difficult time with To Do lists, because after I make them I immediately wish I hadn't. Having a physical To Do list rather than a mental one instantly makes all the unpleasant tasks on the list much more immediate. I look at the list and think, "Damn, now I actually have to accomplish this stuff."

But, if you're anything like me you begin avoiding your To Do list the moment it's made. Often I'll put my hands into my pockets and pull out an old To Do list that's gone through the wash without a single item crossed off. Or worse, I am one of those people who complete a task that isn't on the list, then add it to the list simply so that I can cross it off and feel like I'm making progress.

I'm telling you this because my list of Things To Do Before I Move To Minnesota is enormous. And yet, I've crossed off more than half of it. Want proof?

Things To Do Before I Move To Minnesota

• Tell my family
• Tell my friends
• Find someone to take over my room in the apartment
  
• Pare down my wardrobe and donate whatever I don't keep. If I haven't worn it in a year IT GOES!
• Sell my bed
• Coordinate furniture with David and sell whatever we aren't bringing with us
• Get rid of all that useless crap I keep in those pretty boxes on my dresser. I know it's in there, even if I can't see it. Empty bottles and bits of ribbon way too small to ever be of any use. Get rid of all the junk!
• Get my security deposit back
• Move into David's studio to save money
• Pack for the move in with David; Pack for the move to Minnesota
• Have a sidewalk sale and sell whatever I can
• Give my 2 weeks' notice at work
• Cancel my gym membership
• Fill out a change of address form
• Call my doctor to see if I can fill my prescription out of the state. If not, see if I can get a prescription that will allow me to do so.
• Compare prices and hire a rental truck
• Recruit as many people as possible to help us load up the truck when the time comes, as there is no freaking way that I can help David get that couch down two flights of stairs.
  

I'm sure that list will grow, but I have to say I'm impressed with the amount of items crossed off (items, I might mention, that were genuinely crossed off, and not just added as an afterthought so that I could cross them off and feel more accomplished!)

Since breaking the news that David and I are moving to the midwest I've been touched (but not surprised) by the overwhelmingly positive and supportive reactions from my family members and friends. After their initial shock wears off, the questions I am most often asked have to do with my feelings about whisking off to the unknown and leaving everything behind. Usually when in the midst of answering those questions I say something like, "I'm really, really excited! I feel really positive about it. This is absolutely the right decision!"

And while that's all true, I've also been thinking about how to articulate more clearly what I'm experiencing right now. And maybe the best way to do that is to point out the fact that I am actively crossing things off my To Do list.

I am in love with David Van Sant. So much so, that if I were to describe it at length it would probably make him blush as he scrolls through this update on his google reader (hi honey!). I am so, so in love and every moment that we spend planning, working, hoping, and building these dreams into reality affirms that this is the person I want to spend my life with, and that life is going to happen in Minnesota. Every item I cross off my list brings me one step closer to that reality. So, how do I feel about whisking off into the unknown?

I feel ready.

Oh, and I have one more thing to add to my To Do list just for the sheer joy of crossing it off.

• Start a blog